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  1. The F Plus

    Thursday, May 17, 2012

    The Internet:  never have there been so many crystal clear springs set next to so many filth-ridden pools of the spit poured out of those nasty cups people who chew dip carry around with them in a pathetic attempt to disguise the fact that they're spitting in the produce section of the grocery store.  For every website that attempts to light the beacon of knowledge, humor, or beauty there are about 23 that are not only producing content that is insipid, wrong, or flat-out dangerous.

    Luckily for us, a lot of those sites are also hilarious.  But who has the time or mental fortitude to pluck out the choice, laughable nuggets from amidst the sprawling sewers of the Webatrons?

    These guys.  Get to know The F Plus.  Since 2009 (dawn of the Internet, I believe) these brave souls have willingly plunged into the dumbest, foulest Internet forums known to mankind to retrieve humorous posts and display them to you, the listener, via dramatic reading.  There will be voices, there will be laughter, and there will be things that once heard, cannot be unheard.   

    Terrible things read with enthusiasm.  

    Relevant Links:
    Main Site!
    Get the podcast on iTunes!
    Get the podcast on!
     or FeedBurner!

    Join me behind the jump, won't you?

     I want the next line to be, "And she had back problems for the rest of her life.  The End."

    Internet forums are sort of like the opposite to the one million monkeys that will eventually write the works of Shakespeare.  The monkeys' nonesense will eventually create genius, whereas no matter how many people sign up for forums, they will never do anything more than spew stupid, stupid, stupid words from their keyboards.  I mean goodness sakes, there is a lot of stupid to spread around.  Just mountains of it lying all over the place.  And The F Plus is able to find the stupid diamonds among this stupid rough and use them to make you laugh.  Stupidly. 

    Is that diabeetus or diabetes?
    No, only Wilford Brimley had diabeetus.

    The F Plus podcast consists of a collection of "readers" who reenact select forum entries for maximum humor and horror.  The readers are clever and never short of wit or dismay at whatever it is they're reading for the week, sharing their experience earnestly with the audience as they subject themselves to fetish/pseudoscience/nonsense forum that has been mined for content.   Subjects will range from the tolerably-gross to the bizarre to the "people believe that?" and everywhere in between. 

    Content Rating: ExplicitExpllllliiiiicccciiiiitttttt for the sole reason of the weirdness someone will overhear if you play this with speaker.  I suggest headphones anytime you might be near a person that has never heard of 4chan before.

    I say this will all genuine-KILL YOURSELF.

    Average Episode Length:  Around 58 minutes.  There are some episodes that are very short, running about 15 minutes.

    My monocle!

    Drinking Game:  Drink each time:
    • The readers dissolve into giggles.
    • Godwin's law should be invoked.
    • A misspelled word is pronounced as the forum user misspelled it.

    That was... cocainy!

    Release Schedule:

    I like the gang-stalking story very much, but I felt like there wasn't enough homophobia in it. 

    Music:  Lots and lots of transitional music.  The songs are related to the theme of what is being read.

    Unintentionally Good Part:  Reader Bunnybread's voice.  I find it soothing.

    Unintentionally Bad Part:  The way that your faith in humanity degrades further and further with each episode as you realize that what the hosts are reading were originally written with full sincerity by an actual human.

    That's a sentence, I guess?
    Well, there's a semicolon there, so it's classy.

    Unrelated rating: Two mod probations out of two.

    Please take a chance on this podcast.  Despite some of the topics read, this is not overly-ish graphic and The F Plus podcast is one of the funniest I have found in a while.  You will laugh, you will love, and you will learn of the insanity of others.  Go listen!

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