viddyviddy

Lou Fernandez is a man with ambition. His goal is to be a professional voice actor, which is a rad goal. As he attempts to make it to the big time he has decided to practice his reading so as to refine his skills. However, rather than reading...anything else, he has made great efforts to read from the depths of the Internet.

And my friends, we all benefit from his efforts. Welcome to Lou Reads the Internet for YOU!

I don't understand things and I don't think I want to.

Relevant Links:
Main Site! Features lots of different ways to find the podcast.
iTunes!
Listen on Stitcher!
Lou on Facebook!
Twitter!

Lou Reads the Internet for YOU! is a podcast of contradictions. On one hand you have Lou Fernandez, a dude of what I'm going to assume is a mild-mannered nature with a very nice voice. Deep without going into Barry White territory, soothing enough to sell me something without bothering me. I can imagine him narrating a yoga DVD or something like that.

Then you have the stuff he reads to you. Is horrifibad a strong enough imaginary word to describe to you the content of this podcast?  I have reviewed other podcasts that focus around the "Atrocity Tourism" shtick of finding gross things and reading them but yeesh. Here there be dragons.

If you are familiar with the podcast The F Plus then I can tell you with sincerity that it is more tame than Lou Reads the Internet for YOU! Seriously, this is a view into the unvarnished interior of some messed up people.

So do I like this podcast? Is the smooth voice enough to pave over the horror-show content? Well, yes. For one, you feel WAY BETTER about yourself as a human being after listening to the weird stuff people get up to in their day-to-day lives. I'd recommend this podcast as an occasional listen, because you really do need to maintain at least a shred of faith in humanity somewhere in your head.

To be clear, Lou doesn't truck with any of the stuff he reads and there is no sympathy for the psychopathic minds that decide one day to open a forum thread and chat about what drugs they put where on their body that week. He's just a man with a good voice and a Something Awful account.

Content Rating: Explicit! The titles of the episodes will let you know exactly what you're in for.

Average Episode Length: Ooh, it's all over the place. Earlier episodes are quite short, just a few minutes each. Current episodes run around a half-hour long.

Drinking Game:  Practice your own melodious reading-aloud skills with the Fox on Socks drinking game.

Release Schedule:  Looks like there is a release about twice a month.

Music: A little zippy piece of music that I assume comes with a copy of Garage Band. I love it! It's got a beat you can dance to and remains charming after several listens.

Unintentionally Good Part:  I'm assuming my expression of dawning horror as I listen to the various stories and admissions people put on the Internet. Holy crap, y'all. I think I strained my eyebrows after I lifted them so many times in disbelief. There was one episode where I had this open-mouthed scowl going on because I couldn't deal with what I was hearing.  WHO DOES THIS STUFF?

Unintentionally Bad Part:  The only thing that trips me up is that there's no change in tone when Lou goes from reading an excerpt to his own thoughts or comments. Makes me do a double take from time to time.

Unrelated rating: Two stairs from your house out of three.

According to a reliable source, it is Spring time! 

According to another reliable source, this is the time of year where people go outside and do... things?  They do activities of some sort, which are apparently fun?  I'm not sure what you can do that's fun and doesn't require a power source to operate.  I mean, I guess people could have portable generators so they can set up their computers in the yard but that sounds like a hassle. 

I don't do outside.  Mankind struggled against all kinds of dangers to invent important technology that has advanced our species, and I intend to honor those brave souls who spent their lives in toil by staying inside and enjoying what they have given us.

For my purposes, the 5 greatest inventions are as follows:

1. Air conditioning
2. Internet
3. Mountain Dew Baja Blast
4. The Slanket
5. Penicillin 

However, even if I don't go outside where all the grass and the Big Sky Lamp live, I realize that other people do.  In the spirit of intrepid journalism, I would like to do a review for a podcast that involves something a person has to willingly go outside for:  gardening!

I put on extra sunscreen just to write this review of Garden How-To.

Relevant Links:
Main Site
Download from iTunes
Horticultural Magazine Twitter
A YouTube Channel!
Store

Content Rating:  Clean as a freshly washed hot house cucumber.  Not a lot of room to get frothed up when you're talking about plants, I suppose.

Host Kathy Cropp (her last name is Cropp and she talks about gardening, how awesome is that!) welcomes you into the wide world of gardening and invites you to pull up one of those little foam pads to protect your knees, pick up a trowel, and join her in the freshly shoveled dirt.  If you've even looked out at your backyard and seen potential for something more than a thing you occasionally mow, this is your podcast.

Don't have a yard?  EPISODE SEVEN, "LANDLESS GARDENING", GOT YOU COVERED.  The subjects move from decorative plants to vegetable garden tips and lots of other topics that can help a garden grow. 

Release Schedule:  The last released episode was in February, 2012, so I am going to say that the release schedule is erratic/sporadic. 


Episode Length:  About-ish 29 minutes.  Just right to water your plants and listen.

Music:  A little toodly-oodly bit at the start. 

Unintentionally Good Part:  The.  Host's.  Name.  Is.  Kathy.  Cropp.  That's good enough for me.

Unintentionally Bad Part:  The host has a lovely, mellow voice.  Unfortunately for me, I can tell that it is the kind of Smooth Jazz Radio voice that would put me to sleep if I tried to listen to it at work. 

This podcast features the expertise of the host as well as a wide variety of guests that can help bring their point of view and knowledge to whatever subject is at hand.  Topics are explained in simple language, so that the novice gardener can get a good start and the practiced gardener can learn new facts/techniques to add to their routine.  Plus, it is nice to picture all the descriptions of the pretty plants they talk about.  Terribly soothing, all in all. 

Go on and give Garden How-To a listen and try some of their helpful tips out in your own plot of land?  As for me, I'mma go throw on another Slanket and maybe watch HGTV.  That suits me just fine.

Hey!  I've been working on figuring out this whole Web 2.0 thingy that seems to be going on, and I found something cool.  I made a little Amazon.com shop on the sidebar! 

Yeah, I know, shut up.  Uncle ViddyViddy wants himself a slice of that Internet pie he's always hearing about.

The part I want you to know about is that I was able to pick a selection of books written by people who also host podcasts!  If you really enjoy a podcast that's been reviewed on this site, give my store a look.  There's a good chance that the host(s) have a book or two to their name as well.

This site is a chance for me to try and show people things that I enjoy, in the hopes that they enjoy them as well.  I'll try to do the same with the little storefront I've got going on.  Give it a click, ignore it, never see it because you have Adblock installed, pretend to light it on fire, whatever.  I think it is nifty.

Also, I named it "Uncle ViddyViddy's Pit n' Git."  Technology is a wonderful thing, children.

Greetings imaginary audience,

If you're hungry for more viddy (and I know you are), then step on over to

http://www.havencomics.blogspot.com/

There you can find the latest comic book releases, game days, and going-ons that are happening at the hottest geek corner of Alabama. I'll be dropping the occasional article, so check it out!