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If you're anything like me, then the next best thing to actually eating food is watching someone else deal with food and food-related objects. Food Network is one of the last channels I watch on an actual TV over actual cable television, and my favorite show has always been Good Eats. The show has a devoted Tivo folder, I loved his Feasting on Asphalt and Feasting on Waves and all that good stuff he's been on.

AND NOW HE'S AVAILABLE IN PODCAST FORM!

Wonders of wonders, miracles of miracles~

Sorry, I just really like Alton Brown. He taught me a lot about cooking, not that I actually apply any of it to my boxed lasagna, but I still felt good learning about it.

Go ahead and preheat your oven to 350F, then turn that thing off because you're going to listen to The Alton Browncast.   

TV Host and Foodist Alton Brown reviews recent food news, chats with celebrities about their culinary passions, takes calls from listeners, and basically does whatever he flippin’ wants for 45 minutes.

Relevant Links:
Main Podcast Site, via Nerdist! This site also serves as an archive.
RSS Feed!
Get the podcast via iTunes!
Alton's Twitter!   He replies to tweets by writing out a response on a Post-It and taking a picture of it! Hee!

The Alton Browncast provides host Alton Brown (GO FIGURE, RIGHT?) a lovely little venue to talk about what really interests him in the food world. He will discuss recent food-related news, interview fellow creative chefs and food crafters, and answer cooking questions from his listening audience. It's a nicely balanced little podcast, shifting easily between topics as Alton delves into his knowledge and passion for all things food. If you like his personality on any of the plethora of shows he's been on you will find more of the same in this podcast.

I gotta tell you right now, buttermilk and Cap'n Crunch cereal? Those things don't go together.

Content Rating: Clean, and I really can't imagine this podcast ever being explicit.

Average Episode Length: Set your timer for just a smidgin over an hour. You'll want the toothpick to be clean, with only a few moist crumbs sticking to it when you test for doneness.


Release Schedule:  Once a week, with the release date most likely to be a Friday.


Unintentionally Good Part:  Listening to Bobby Flay's story about making "queso" at his wife's behest. Cute story.

Unintentionally Bad Part: Bad part, bad part, is there a bad part? Sorry, I'm an Alton Brown fan, so he gets a clean pass.  #@#$%!$ SLURPING DURING AN ICE CREAM TASTING SERIOUSLY THAT IS THE WORST NOISE IN MY EARS.   Aaaaaaargh okay, okay, I found a bad part! I give!

Auwgh! Hate that noise.

Unrelated rating: Two of those little yeast puppets from Good Eats out of three.

Games, game, video games. Who likes to talk about video games?

EVERYONE AND THEIR CAT.

Which is not a bad thing! I've reviewed and listened to (and still listen to) loads of podcasts that do nothing more than discuss video games, and you know what? Each one is a unique little beam of sunshine. Differing viewpoints, gotta love 'em.

I like to listen to a set of friends sitting around and recalling the arcades they haunted in their youth, I like it when people flip their lids over the next generation of consoles, I like hearing the funny bugs and the stories of how people have accidentally written-over hundreds of hours of game play.

So let us go once more into the breach, together, to discover and admire The Crate & Crowbar podcast.

That's a great question that you just didn't ask but I'm thinking in my head.

Relevant Links:
Main Site!
RSS Feed!
Get the podcast via iTunes!
Twitter!

First off, to make sure this is your bag, The Crate & Crowbar is a PC gaming podcast. Let it be known that they will not be touching on subjects that involve your precious console-related hijinks. Your hosts include Tom Francis (@pentadact), Graham Smith (@gonnas), Marsh Davies (@marshdavies), Tom Senior (@PCGLudo), Chris Thursten (@cthursten) and the cool part, the part that made me nod at my monitor in appreciation, is that they all have experience within the PC gaming realm. That's neat, right? That's what drew me to the podcast in the first place, and I was not disappointed with what I had downloaded.

Content Rating: Explicit because of swear words.

Average Episode Length: Each episode is dang near TWO HOURS. That's a tremendous podcast length!

Drinking Game: Pick a drink that catches your eye from Drunken Moogle, and then Google a stupid drinking game that relates to the game your drink is themed on.

The Crate & Crowbar podcast is your weekly, ramble into the wide world of PC gaming. And I don't mean ramble in the way of an unfocused monologue, but more like walking out of your front door and heading out in whatever direction pleases you that day. After about two hours, you'll return to your front porch, open the door, and feel satisfied with how you spent your time.

If Valve continues to be right about this and they keep working at this there will be some future where everything is free, but everyone is also rich, and no one understands why!

The focus of the hosts' discussion is both wide-and-industry-savvy as well as the narrow-what-I-played-last-night zoom. For instance, in one episode they go from discussing Steam and Valve, to the overall play style of DOTA 2, to one hosts experience and recollection of how and why he plays. It's fun to listen to and the hosts are engaging and charming.

Release Schedule: Weekly release on Friday.

Music: None that I've noticed.

Unintentionally Good Part: I'm a sucker for foreign accents.

Unintentionally Bad Part: With the pace of a longer podcast such as this, you might find that when a topic you're uninterested in crops up it will last a lot longer than you'd please.

Unrelated rating: Five out of five levels of Dagon.

All right, readers, I'm going to say a phrase, and it is going to let you know whether or not this podcast is for you. It's going to challenge some world-views, shake up some dialogues, that sort of thing, so be ready.

Are you appropriately clenched? Okay, here it is:

"Handcrafted food meta-discussion"

Were you struck blind? Wait, stupid question. But did that turn your lip up in a sneer or strike your fancy? I'm sure some of you have already moved on to watching cat videos, so I'll address those that remain. If you want to know more, then you'll want to check out The Food Craftsmen podcast.

Relevant Links:
Main Site!
Get the podcast here!
Twitter!

Remember: food is life, and life is great.

Discussions about the fat content of heritage pig breeds!

Learning the difference between Latin American and European styles of gourmet chocolates!

Did you know there is a big, annual competition in Ohio for sustainable food producers? I didn't have the slightest idea until I started listening to The Food Craftsman podcast.

At first, I was disappointed. I like to cook, and I was expecting a podcast that might offer me some cooking tips on how to improve my prosciutto-wrapped Hot Pockets. Instead I found a show featuring interviews with food producers that produce good foods in new and ethical ways. So I kept listening, and discovered that it is pretty cool to hear not only how people cook, but why they do it the way they do, and how they go about building and maintaining a successful business.

Host Ryan K. Parker guides the interviews expertly, and his earnest interest in each topic shows through in the discussion. Anything from store design to favorite recipes is up for discussion, and the conversations are natural and flowing.

Content Rating: Clean, although it would be really funny to hear an explicit version of this. #$!@$ SMALL BATCH CHEESE!

Ooh, wait! There is a single explicit episode! Dreams are coming true!

Average Episode Length: Approximately 25 minutes.

Drinking Game: Find yourself a locally brewed beer or two, then share it with friends. Make pretentious statements about the hops after each sip while listening to this podcast.

Release Schedule: Weekly, with no apparent set day of release.

Music: A very nice, smooth song for opening/ending. I like it a lot.

Unintentionally Good Part: The Food Craftsmen podcast is a great venue to hear about foods you didn't know about! With this whole Internet thing, you can find their site and order delicious foods to expaaaaaaaand your pallet.

What kind of wine pairs well with Lean Pockets?

Unintentionally Bad Part: It makes me really hungry to listen to this podcast.

Unrelated rating: Three Instagram photos of food out of three.