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  1. Rooster Teeth Productions: Drunk Tank

    Wednesday, December 1, 2010

    Before I begin this review, let me draw your attention to one of the most important creative creations that human kind has ever created.


    Not just any Halo, but the Haloz. You've either played through one of its many iterations, been forced to watch as other people have played it or you are merely taking a break from playing it right now to rehydrate from screaming obscenities into your headset before you go back to playing it.

    Some people have taken their fervor for this game to amazing heights, going so far as to recreate Master Chief's armor. A few have permanently marred themselves to show their devotion. At least one couple even got married by Master Chief.

    Some people celebrate Halo as a part of their life. Some people build an empire on it. These some people be Rooster Teeth. Then these some people made a thing, which is also a podcast, which it called that Drunk Tank.
    These some sentences no work too good. Halp!

    Relevant Links:

    Main Site

    After establishing themselves as the gods of machinima (a word that Firefox is unfamiliar with) they spread their digitally rendered wings and now they're all over the place with live action shorts, a comic based on their day-to-day hijinks, and forums just to name a few of their endeavors. Good thing they made this podcast because, seriously, what a bunch of slackers.
    Burnie: "Have you ever in your life, Gus, ever had to figure out what the area under a parabola is?"
    Gus: "No."
    Burnie: "Has that come up once?"
    Gus: "No, never."
    Burnie: "So they're literally teaching us things that we don't need to know.
    Gus: "Nope, no need for that."
    Burnie: "Volume of a cylinder? Ever come up?"
    Gus: "Uh-once. Once. And not too long ago."
    Burnie: "What for, condoms?"

    The Drunk Tank podcast consists of the main pillars of the Rooster Teeth Productions crew talking. And talking. And then yelling at each other before they go back to just talking. Burnie Burns, Matt Hullum, Joel Heyman, Geoff Ramsey, Griffon Ramsey and Gustavo Sorola serve as the main hosts. Occasionally an intern is thrown into the mix to give Gus someone to yell at. Discussion ranges from video games, recounting stories from life, movies, alcohol and anything else that comes to mind.

    Drunk Tank broaches such topics as:
    • Poisonous spiders and the recognition of them
    • Those Lava Cake things you can get from Dominos
    • Removing holy cards that had been buried in your yard
    • Airlines and flying habits

    Content Rating: Explicit. Swear words just flyin' around all over the place.

    Average Episode Length: My highly scientific method of "squinting at iTunes" reveals that the average length is around an hour. There is a week long series of shorter episodes, so let's just exclude those shall we?

    Drinking Game: It is a podcast called Drunk Tank. I trust you can come up with something, people.

    Release Schedule: Weekly, with a new episode released each Wednesday! A delightful mid-week treat.

    Music: This is where it gets interesting. What began as a contest to select a permanent theme song has morphed into a weekly showcase of fan-made opening songs. Some of the songs are exquisite and hilarious (see episodes 11, 34, 35 and 81) and many many many many many many songs are so bad I have to turn the volume all the way down until they're over. I'm always loathe to express my dislike of fan-created content, but honestly! There is a massive distance between "It has been confirmed by outside sources that I am capable of singing" and "A microphone came with my computer." I'm also throwing out this caveat: there is amateur rapping. Consider yourself warned.

    Unintentionally Good Part: This podcast falls under the subcategory of "friends talking to each other" which means that there will be parts when no host can talk because they are paralyzed with laughter. It is safe to assume that you will suffer the same fate as well, so try to make sure you're sitting on the floor if you feel an impending rofl fit.

    Unintentionally Bad Part:
    Other than the listener submitted opening songs? This podcast is banter, banter, banter and occasionally the topic will fall onto something you have absolutely NO interest in whatsoever. And then it will remain there for forty minutes.

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